Earlier this year my husband gave a cracker of a sermon… it has stuck with me. For many reasons.
One of those reasons is the way the message keeps repeating itself in my life advantageously.
His sermon had the key message of knowing your own story, and being ready to give testimony at any time for the hope that you have.
Right after church that night we went to the playground to let our kids run off their energy – and we met a woman who asked me a question straight away to practice this skill. Naturally I was not ready!
She asked me why we do what we do…. I responded with “Ummmm well….” which gave her enough time to clarify her question. Her question was “Why did you move to the country from the city” - and not the bigger question of “Why do you Pastor a church?”. Thankfully the country move question was an easy one to answer. We love the slower pace, financial affordability and closeness to family.
But the bigger question sat there and I have thought about it ever since. I really should have a good answer for why my husband and I are spending our lives the way we are. It impacts on our children’s lives, and for the most part is hugely counter-cultural.
In my most recent youth work at Ruby’s, we employed narrative therapeutic strategies with young people and their families. I love this kind of work. It is hard and deep but helps us know ourselves in a much more complete way, and gives us non-threatening ways to have power over our own lives, and the opportunity to participate in creating the future of our story.
I love the opportunity to re-write our previous story – understand it in new ways – and move forward with a new story in our lives.
Jesus was all about stories too. He taught through stories all the time and the bible is a sacred text that continues to speak to people through story today.
I’ve been spending a bit of time learning about Martin Luther King Junior this year too. He spoke a lot about the power of words. And his words challenged a nation to rethink the value of each person, regardless of race.
This week I went and spoke at a local women’s event. The organiser asked me to speak about my life and work and all these thoughts were with me. I felt I was finally ready to give testimony about why I do what I do. I spoke about my deep connectedness to Micah 6:8 – to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly. And I spoke about my deep desire so see people live loved, in communities where they find belonging and hope. This is why we Pastor – because we believe in love and we believe in inclusive communities. And this is why I work as a community worker.
Regardless of what we find ourselves called to do vocationally, regardless of what spiritual beliefs we hold, I believe there is power in our words – in being able to give testimony when someone asks you “Why do you do what you do?”.
In business, in community, and in life: to be able to give account and explanation for our choices builds understanding rather than fear in our communities – and builds our shared story of what is important to all of us.
For when I am privileged to hear your story and know you better, and when you hear my story and know me better – our community is united and bonded by our common ground and love for each other.
One of my favourite quotes is “Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about”. We do not know the story others are carrying with them. The things they have overcome or are wading through. But we can come to know their stories if we ask. And if we listen.
As a therapist, listening well and asking questions that provide space for people to think about their story and understand it in new ways is the heart of my practice.
If you would like some time or space to think about the story of your life – or the story you would like your life to tell going forward – please contact me!
In the meantime – let’s continue to build communities of understanding, rather than fear. Let’s listen well and know our own story well enough to answer when someone asks us why we do what we do! You have this one life – use it well and use it on purpose!